Fly By Twilight: Wanna Be Fang Cullen
by St. Fang of Boredom
Summary: A song to go along with my 'Fly By Twilight' series.  Based on 'The Edward Cullen Song'.


Me: Was working on the newest installment of the Fly By Twilight series, 'The Volturi', and needed some Twilight inspiration, so I looked up 'Edward Cullen Song' and got...'The Edward Cullen Song' which is basically a parody of Kanye West's 'Heartless'. Well, I had the inspiration for this song and decided to write it up as a little something extra for my faithful, patient, Fly By Twilight readers. So, I-

Fang: I like how epic I'm described here.

Me: Fang! Don't Kanye me!

Fang: Knock knock.

Me: -sigh- Who's there?

Fang: Interrupting Kanye!

Me: Interrupting Kanye w-

Fang: Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time!

Me: -facepalm- Shut up. Anyway, I just typed up this little song, I hope you can find some mild enjoyment in it.

**In This Fic, This Thing I Know, Keeps Me From Getting Sued So Low:** I do not own Maximum Ride. If I did, Fang would have stayed, Iggy would've acted his age, and Dylan's fairy godmother would've made him into a real boy. I do not own Twilight. If I did, Bella would have got over the creeper and moved on, Edward would have died in Volterra, and Jacob would've gotten the girl. I do not own 'Heartless', since I feel no need to get strange hair cuts and interrupt award winners on TV. I don't own the Edward Cullen Song. I have nothing mildly funny to point out that would happen if I did own it, but I'm sure if I did, something mildly funny would happen.

**ClaimsChowder: **Fly By Twilight and everything associated with it is mine, though. OCs, plot and name ideas...Mine. No touchy.

* * *

In Fly By Twilight

This guy I know

The palest skin you ever saw

But all the girls still want him, though,

And now you know,

I wanna be like Fang Cullen.

I wanna be Fang Cullen.

Wish I could be Fang Cullen.

.

Wish I could be Cul-

len, Wish that I could get all the girls, yo.

Didn't have to breathe,

Could eat any food,

And, of course, I want to turn invisible.

.

I want to sparkle in the light and drive Ed's Volvo.

Hang with Cody, Alanna, and Antonio.

Although it would suck to never turn 18.

Because I know pedophiles would try to rape me.

.

I want to say that Iggy and Jake are my homies.

Be a vegetarian even though I eat meat.

Want to say that my middle name's Zuriel.

That's such an awesome name.

They'll all be jealous of me.

.

In Fly By Twilight

This guy I know

The palest skin you ever saw

But all the girls still want him, though,

And now you know,

I wanna be like Fang Cullen.

I wanna be Fang Cullen.

Wish I could be Fang Cullen.

.

Wish I could be in the Flock.

Or Dr. Cullen's Olympic Coven.

Then Fang would be my brethern.

And he can tell me how to be more like him.

.

Jazz and Emmett are so cool, also.

And Alice is like Katy Perry, Hot 'n Cold.

Don't wanna be near Rosalie, though.

'Cause I have a thing about being around A-Holes.

.

I'd run and tell Fang to leave Maximum please.

It's obvious she'd much rather be with me.

But if he says no, then I'll have to agree.

'Cause honestly, he could beat the crap outta me.

.

In Fly By Twilight

This guy I know

The palest skin you ever saw

But all the girls still want him, though,

And now you know,

I wanna be like Fang Cullen.

I wanna be Fang Cullen.

Wish I could be Fang Cullen.

.

Walkin', walkin', walkin' can die.

Wish I could be like Fang and fly.

Then I would be so much faster.

And I'd be home in time for Phineas and Ferb.

.

If I was Fang

I would be

A million times hotter

Than he could ever be.

.

And Ari would be afraid of me.

.

And I would live happily.

If I could turn invisible.

Wanna have Fang Cullen's life.

Hang with Renesmee all the time.

Just like...

.

In Fly By Twilight

This guy I know

The palest skin you ever saw

But all the girls still want him, though,

And now you know,

I wanna be like Fang Cullen.

I wanna be Fang Cullen.

Wish I could be Fang Cullen.

.

Cullen...Cullen...Cullen...Cullen...Cullen...Cullen...(repeats)

* * *

Me: Well, it's not amazing, but it's entertaining. I had fun with it.

Fang: And it made me sound awesome, which is fine with me.

Me: -eyeroll- You're so full of-

Fang: Interrupting Kanye!

Me: -facepalm-

R&R?


End file.
